I found the comfort I was looking for. And I would have never expected it where it came from. I was at the office after my first workout at Curves and trying to finish up Satan’s work (otherwise known as coding the clips for the MB show). And at the doorway pops little KC and his mom to come fetch his dad, K. This isn’t the first time I’ve seen KC. He and I have played office basketball before and hung out in the office. He’s always pleasant and inquisitive. As any 4 year old should be. But today, he popped in the doorway and I put on my feigned but believable cheer and said, “HI KC!!!” and waved frantically. In a half of a second, he was at my lap to come give me a hug. Unexpected but I obliged. Then he hopped into my lap and rested his head on my chest and proceeded to ask me about my day and what I was doing, etc. Which is the norm for him to ask. But his posture was so endearing. He felt so comfortable and relaxed to just be in my presence. And for once in a long time, I didn’t feel like the cursed lady that shatters the protective onyx fists hung around the necks of babies (I’ll explain another time). I felt loved and at home and not cursed and not such a bad person to be around. And for a few minutes I really forgot all of my troubles.
I’m at peace for now. I hope it lasts.