14 Weeks

Yaay to me and being in the 2nd Trimester! I’m extremely excited about this and cannot wait to experience all the changes here in. I am a little more “carefree” and relaxed these days about the pregnancy. I’m sure it all had to do with the fact that the Nuchal came back with numbers that put the Doctor at ease. To the point where he doesn’t really see the need to do a CVS or an Amnio down the line. So that’s a huge relief. I finally made the announcement to family friends and facebook – and while the majority of folks welcomed the news with happiness and excitement, some folks felt that their status in my life required more of an engraved announcement. They were mad because I sent an email – in an attempt to tell everyone at the same time. I spent a little time mad about it… and then sad about it. But then realized that most of those same people who were upset? I’d not heard from in AGES. I’m tired of feeling melancholy – I want to be excited about my baby and the fact that this is all a huge amazing miracle. Some of the upset ones have had their chance… they had their babies.. they know what it’s all like. And some of them aren’t. I’ll let them get to this point and they can figure out how they’d like to tell anyone.

Honestly, the whole practice of hiding it for 13 weeks is NERVE WRECKING. Because all you want to do is share with someone… anyone… But no. Cower in fear at the prospect that you might announce and then something terrible can happen. That? all by it self? can drive you mad. Maybe mad enough to accidentally miscarry.

Well, anyway it’s sliced – it’s tough living this life – even if it’s only for 9 months. People expect a lot. But the bottom line is that I’M expecting. So it’s okay for me to be a little selfish right now – and have this be about me and my little one on the way. We have an appointment this week so that I can get a glimpse at the development. It makes me nervous to go this long w/o seeing her, but it makes the trips even more so worth it. I just hope the placenta has moved. I need the docs to lift this sex restriction! LOL!

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