The Best Laid Plans…

The Best Laid Plans…

“Sometimes God puts his hand on something and moves it in a direction. Let Him. Because it’s only when we push back… that we get bad results. “

This is what my Godmother (Nininne) told me when i called her and told her that I had made an aggregious mistake in the booking of my flight and would NOT be with her this weekend like I thought I’d be able to. In the excitement of finding a fare that wasn’t 500 million dollars on a site called airfare.com, which I’m not altogether sure that I’d use again… I booked a flight for me and D for 3/24 – 3/26. WOO HOO!!! Friday through Sunday! It was only 219 per person when all other airlines were charging 4 and 5. I couldn’t believe it but I wasn’t gonna look a gift horse in the mouth. AAWWW YEAH!!! As I’m sitting at my desk yesterday, desperately attempting to wrap things up so that I could have a clean conscience when I got on the plane on Friday, I get a call from D. “Did you know that this reservation says MAR24?” – huh???

WHAT???

Yeah. I did it to myself again. Not to mention I’ve been making the same kind of stupid mistake at work. I’m really beginning to think something is seriously wrong with me. So… I had planned this big trip for me and a bunch of my girlfriends to go down and see my Nininne and I wouldn’t WAIT to just get out of NY for a little while. But because I was too excited… I booked a flight for a full month later than I meant to. I scrambled around for about 3 hours trying to find all possible ways for us to still go without our wallets BLEEDING. But it was impossible. It was gonna cost us AT LEAST $600 more dollars to get out there. I called my Nininne, completely defeated, praying that she hadn’t gone and bought food for us all yet. And she put me totally at ease. “You’re NOT supposed to be here this weekend. That’s all. God has a different plan for you. Don’t worry. Relax and let it happen. So, you’ll come down in March. As long as I’m home, you can come ANY TIME YOU WANT.” She was so understanding and amazing that I started to tear up. “You’re not crying, are you?” she asked. “I was good until just now… I swear, “I admitted. “OH GIVE ME A BREAK!” she said with full eye rolling and what-am-i-gonna-do-with-this-child attitude.

Of course then followed the multitudes of phone calls letting folks down and disappointing. The worst of which I think was Vic – because she was down there already, she booked her ticket in like… 2003. She’s so thorough. And I felt like such HOT garbage calling her to let her know that I wasn’t coming. I would hope that she needed to take a vacay regardless, just to ease her mind and remove her from this setting. *Sigh* I still want to do something for her.

So we’re re-aligning for March 24 – 26. Hopefully this time we can pull it off. So… 4 more days of sitting at home. Whee….

*sigh*

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Catsup

Catsup

or Ketchup… or recap, if you will.

Don’t really have much energy tonight. Really feeling that void. Been trying to fill it with stuff, but nothing is working today.

Recap – I won the first half of my case which released the levies on my accounts. Both of them. Nothing in life feels more restrainging. Now I have to get in there and dispute the debt itself. So … wish me luck.

Valentine’s Day – almost called the wedding off – but we managed to work our way through it. A story for another day.

Charles – Went to his wake. Couldn’t even get in the door there were so many people. His bio was 2 pages long. 32 years old. He lived it with a sense of urgency. What the heck am I waiting for? How many more of my young friends will have to pass before I get off my ass?

Chasm. – I found this image that I used to have on my wall when I was in College.

I don’t really know where it came from or who made it or how I got a hold of it… or the name of it. but I’ve always really been able to indentify with it. And I hate that.

Sleep.

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Really Nothing

Really nothing

4 jobs I’ve had

Stock girl, Drug Emporium, Elmhurst, NY
Fabric Folder, Jackson Heights Discount Fabrics, Jackson Heights, NY
Computer Applications Teacher, Electronic Learning Labs, Pace U, NY, NY
University 101 Teacher, Pace University, NY, NY

4 DVDs I can keep watching

40 Year old Virgin
Ray
Anchorman
Old School

4 places I wish I had [or intend to] live[d]

ATL
DC
Chitown
Alaska… somewhere.

4 TV shows I watch

The Daily Show with Jon Stewart
Drawn Together
Boondocks “I sent that bitch a smiley face…”
South Park

4 places I’ve traveled

Playa del Carmen, Me-hee-co (Mexico)
Port-au-Prince, Ay-ee-tee (Haiti)
Las Vegas, NV
Indianapolis, IN

4 websites I visit daily

google.com
my own blog (i get to everyone elses links from there)
google.com again
987kissfm.com

4 foods I love

Macaroni and Cheese
Carrot Cake from the Little Pie Co. (is that considered food?)
Haitian food
Roti

4 early musical influences

Michael Jackson’s Thriller Album
Motown’s 25th Anniversary Album
Sugar, Sugar – the Archies
Anything that played on WLTW on a Sunday

4 bloggers Cheney did not shoot (i think…):

Clinky
DramaQueen
Shynstar
FWMJ

4 is my favorite number

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Let it snow!

Let it snow!

It’s really engrained in my biological signature.

Something about snow and me… *sigh*

I LOVE it. Nothing would make me happier than to live in Alaska or… or just maybe further up north or Canada where it snows often. Something about the blanket of silence that it lovingly wraps the city in is meserizing to me. It just insulates sound, and then of course… not a million folks are running around in the street… and for once – everything is quiet. At peace. Asleep. Then is my time to go out an play I used to love going into the snowstorm at night and just enjoying the pink glow of the street lamps on the snow and making fresh snowsteps where where were none. Not even throwing the snow balls AT anyone but throwing it up in the air and seeing the millions of ways the snow would twinkle to the ground. But most of all just sitting quietly IN the snow. It’s so tranquil and hypnotic to me. I looked out my window today and started cheesing like a crazy person. But knowing I can’t go out in it, because I have a wedding to go to today and I can’t ruin my hair. If it wasn’t for that though…

I’d run out in the snow and be there ALL DAY.

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Blank Slate

Blank Slate.

For about 5 minutes every morning… my mind is this (provided I didn’t have a harrowing nightmare or sleepless night). Just blank. In that 5 minutes I convince myself that things are really beautiful and I don’t have a care in the world. Realization seeps in like water through cracks… slowly, quietly and damaging.

Thursday night, I went to say goodbye to an old friend. Diagnosed with cancer, but I’m not sure what kind, it seems to have taken him over… his body is failing and he’d been moved to a hospice where he can, as everyone puts it, “be comfortable”. I was afraid to go see him. I have a thing about final images. And I know last time I saw him, although emaciated… he was clad in tux and tails with his wife at his side at a masquerade ball. Still living to the fullest. But this time you could tell … the cancer had pretty much had it’s way with him. But his spirit was so strong. So strong I left the hospital feeling like… he’d be okay. He’d pull through. We walked into his room and he laid there looking very uncomfortable. But he carried on pleasant conversation with us. Was INCREDIBLY hospitable for someone in his condition. Had a brief talk with me that I’ll always have be my rememberance of him:

Charles: So, what have you been up to?
Me: You know… makin websites… planning for my wedding!
Charles: Yeah?
Me: I’m so excited… it’s going to be wonderful
Charles: I know it will be.
Charles: You have to forgive me for sounding like this… my throat is very dry
Me: Do you need us to get you some juice or ask the nurse to bring something in for you?
Charles: No… I just had something. Thank you though. You’re so sweet.
Me: Thank you. And you’ve always been so strong. I know you’re gonna pull right through this. Umma come back later this week to see you again. Is that alright?
Charles: Yes, I’d like that very much. You’ve always been so sweet. I love you.
Me: I love you, too.

I got the call this morning at 7:00 AM that he passed away last night. Surrounded by friends, family and frat who prayed with him and sang the hymn before he went to his eternal rest. I went into my mom and prayed with her… she held my hand tight and asked that God make “a little room” for my friend and sustain his family through this time of mourning.

I’m sure that God has more than just a little room for Charles. He was certainly here to do God’s work. A superb human being. His slogan in everything he did was “For the People”. And my image of his spirit will always be what lasts. Strong. Sincere. Unconquerable. I was honored and humbled to know him.

You will be missed Charles A. Pringle, Jr. Rest in Peace.

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