Feast

Feast

Okay… so it’s been a 3 blog day. You know what that means. I just couldn’t relate. I couldn’t relate… I had to get in there and mix it up… *Sigh* I LOVE that little cartoon. For those that are clueless, please watch this film: StrongBad Email (gotta watch it through to the end). I was told this was techie humor… but it’s really just for silly people. Hence… why I love them so much *sigh*

Anways… tri-blog means that I couldn’t deal. And when I can’t deal, it’s always best to let Superman handle the job. And he did. Scooped me up from work, took me to a stupid movie… we laughed at it and each other and talked about the future and whether or not we want the kids to have bunk beds… which brought back great memories of my childhood. He took me to get some zinc drops for the stupid tickle in my throat… and dropped me off at my doorstep. Kissed my boo boo and made it better. It’s what he does. *Sigh* (that was a good one).

So now I’m home with… 5 IM windows open (EGADS!) which is like… totally 1999 of me. And also, the opposite of the famine I was experiencing earlier this week. I guess I’ll bask in it while it’s here. Good update: my design skill is getting honed in on a little. Just a tad sleeker… K-dot has complimented me TWICE in as many weeks. It’s HUGE to be validated by a mentor. It’s a shame I didn’t use him more. He’s a wealth of knowledge. Now if we can just get the right cocktail mix of Ritalin, Percocet, Lithium, and Claritin… he might be happy LMAO!!! (I know you’re reading K… just joking… sort of….)

Okay… off to chat a while longer before I make myself go to sleep.

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Shittacious

Shittacious

I’m having a shittacious day. For many reasons that I cannot even begin to elaborate on. Most of them having to do with Money. Recitification… the issues with money pushed me down the slippery slope of shittaciousness today. Just when I think I have my finances under control and shit is paid off… And SHAZZZAAAAAAM… no bitch. The fuck u thinkin? You ain’t caught up on SHIT. As a matter of fact… (this is circumstance speaking) lemme put your shit in the negative and let you dig out. Or hide from your checking account for the next week till you get paid. FUCK. FUCK. FUCK. I’m NOT happy. I just needed to not wake up today. Why’d I bother?

At this time in my shittacious blog, I’d like to give a shout to my friend Max. Who for the last few weeks I’ve been thinking of her and shaking my head thinking… That’s my dawg for real. Not that this is a new discovery… but I realized I had been holding her at a bit of arms length for a while. And if something was happening, I’d not tell her or just keep it to myself for fear of dragging her down. But I find when I do tell her (if I can get past her starting with her own story in the middle of my explanation or if I can happen to keep her attention when she’s at work (jokes))… she is super fantastically helpful. Just sitting on the phone with her and both of us working made me feel for a few moments, less shittacious. I ALMOST forgot why I felt so bad to begin with. So thank you to my Maxnificat for saving the day again!

My girl R has been holdin’ it down for me too. Even though I’m annoyed at how much emotion she feels reading this blog. Like… I ruin her day and stuff. You can’t be doing that anymore, R. Makes me curtail what I write… and I can’t afford for my one sanity outlet to be abridged / censored. (((HUGS))) to you… but please don’t let my shittaciousness ruin your day.

Oh well… going to go wallow in my own self pity some more.

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Disturbed Slumber

Disturbed Slumber

I had a few bizzarre dreams that I wanted to document before I forget them. I managed to sleep all the way through the night and almost feel very rested if it wasn’t for the craziness in these dreams that had me up for a few minutes after I’d awaken from them wondering what the hell is going on in my head.

The first of the dreams has definitely got to do with how much I’ve been listening to the new Common album. I’ve been o.d.’ing on it and last night the video for “Go” came out so that makes it even worse. Now I had imagery for my crazy imagination to foose with. So I dreamt that I was basically in this apartment but circa 1970. Lots of orange light and orange muted decoration. And I’m there with… none other than Common. Which isn’t half bad. That’s a good lookin’ brother. Anyways, I’m getting the idea that this is his apt and he’s brought me there to wine and dine and whatever else me. So he’s doing a fine job of it too… cooking for me… reciting poetry all the shit that I love. I start to hear noises in the hall way outside and I immediately get antsy. I start asking him… listen, are you sure no one is coming home tonight? He calmed me down and assured me that no one else was going to be here except he and I. And with that it was time to walk the green mile to the bedroom… which was similarly adorned with orange fixtures and now I knew I was in this apartment, because he laid me on my parents’ bed essentially. Well, he goes and crawls onto the bed on top of me in between my legs and he starts kissing me and caressing me and it all feels great… till I hear a key in the front door. In the dream I automatically knew I wasn’t supposed to be here. This wasn’t my place and I was stealing moments from someone else. So I hid under the bed and listened quietly as Common went to the front of the apartment to distract and dissuade whoever was there. Obviously female (from her voice) and she ended up leaving. I got up, straightened myself up and made a b-line out of there. He tried to convince me to stay or come back another night, but I was too through with that situation. And the thing that lasted with me beyond the dream was the feeling. That horrid 2nd fiddle feeling. I laid up for a half hour with that feeling before I finally went back to sleep.

The second dream I had was a dream I’ve had before, but it’s so weird I never document it. I’m in a high school. I dare say that I’m attending the High School (but it’s NOT Prep). And there is a mystery to be solved and I’m part of some crackpot group of kids that attend the HS that are like… detectives. The school is antiquated and has a top level floor that was a hotel or something before it became a school and they preserve that part of it for historical reasons. So we go through out the school tryhing to solve this mystery that has to do with terrorists chasing us and we’re trying to get to whatever it is that they came to the school for. All the while having to also deal with the likes of the “popular” clique. Which at th eend of the dream we show them what for. So after we’ve solved the crime and are walking away victorious and independantly minded, as we’re walking up a strip of street I manage to glance into the sky over by the horizon (which I always end up doing anyway) . And as usual I see the plane traffic to LaGuardia (which is by my house) and one plane flips up and does a nose dive into the ground. So I stare and wait to make sure it wasn’t a figment of my imagination. Then I see the black smoke rising and I yell to my teammates: “The planes are falling out of the….” no sooner do I say it than do I see a Space Shuttle. The likes of the Columbia, not yet detatched from it’s fuel tanks flying above us… looking like it’s having mechanical problems and it does the funny flip up and nose dive like… a block from us. After realizing that I didn’t hit us directly in the head… I grabbed the arm of who was next to me and started booking in the opposing direction of where the wake of fire would be travelling. And I woke up running.

Pretty disburbing. I guess I still have my 9/11 nightmares. Those were the only kinds I was having after that experience. Planes just up and crashing. Planes coming through buildings that I live in. Planes taking out family members right in front of me but not me.

Umma have to eat something happier before I go to sleep.

Speaking of Happier… Vernie’s Bridal shower went off with nary a hitch. Here are some pictures:

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